Like many of us, I read with disbelief on Friday that statistically speaking, young people in school now has less chance of graduating (from High School) than their parents and grandparents. This is appalling. I have many teachers in my extended family. They are all very dedicated to their profession. Most of them see it as a Vocation or Call. And as I talk to them, they are all exhausted and worried about their students.
It is easy to label it an education problem. It is equally easy to blame the teacher. But the teachers, the various Departments of Education or the Legislatures. The all have problem people, problem decisions, budget problems, but they are not the problem.
We are the problem.
We are responsible.
We let the situation to develop, evolve and dump in the bucket.
One of my favorite relatives is fond of blaiming "them" for anything from speed limits to street signs to what is served at dinner at her Retirement Center. She has helped me remember the old quote:
" I have met the enemy...and it is I."
Now don't get the idea I am abdicating responsibility to anyone or accepting it all for myself. This is a cultural and national issue.
And again...we are all responsible. Who sits on the School Board of your community? Who sits on Senate or Congressional Committee's that impact on our Education standards? When is the last time you attended a Parent Teachers Association?
Do you read with your pre-schooler? Who checks homework at your home. What is more important....Football practice or finishing a term paper?
My experience as a vacation Bible School teacher teaches me that more parents ask "did you have fun?" before or instead of "what did you learn"? We schedule "play dates" but few "enrichment" dates. I will leave my thoughts on news reports of recent "field trips" in California for another day.
We best wake up and smell the mildewing textbooks. Our children are more apt to use online/text messaging slang and abbreviations that appropriate content, spelled correctly.
For me, I have held this epidemic in prayer for some time. I also have a vision of some of the warriors against this plague. According to the last census, 36.8% of America is over age 47. Not all of us are golfers or snowbirds. Most did graduate. Increasingly we are retiring from industry earlier and living longer. This generation has the time, talent and ability. It is not our's to "fix" alone. But we sure could and should be involved.
We could stand in the GAP for our kids, grandkids and the preservation of our great Nation.
We have a long record of accepting responsibility. Multi-Generational Family Faithfulness involves assisting our families to have a good quality of life here and and eternal reward.
Blessings,
AmmaKate
"We will" is a response in the Sacramental Rites of Baptism, Confirmation and Matrimony. At all three of these sacred ceremonies, the congregation uses this response to promise they will support and assist the recipient of the sacrament to grow in the Faith. This Blog will discuss the many aspects of Christian Formation that the family is called to master.Our aim is to facilitate intergenerational family empowerment in order to live out our Baptism Covenants and live out the Great Commission.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Advent Retreat with Sts. Mary and Anne
AN ADVENT RETREAT WITH STS. MARY and ANNE
SATURDAY, DECEMBER, 13, 2008
9:00 AM - 3:00PM
Location to be announced
Come away for the day to breath in the holiness and messages of Advent. We will concentrate on the both natural and sacred aspect of this time of our liturgical season. As Mary may have done during her time of waiting, we will utilize the Book of Psalms as a jumping off point for prayer, quiet, writing, discussion and fellowship.
We will weave a day’s rhythm of time together and time apart. Time of pondering and times of sharing will be woven into our sacred time together. A labyrinth is available.
Naturally, we will share the noon meal together.
Our time will be led by Rev. Mtr. Katherine Mary Martin, OSA. Kate is a trained and well seasoned Intercessor and retreat leader. Her extensive research on the early church women is apparent in her presentations. Both her professional (Licensed Certified Social Worker/ Ordained Minister) and personal experiences Wife, Mother/Stepmother (6 adult sons), mother-in-law (5 glorious ladies), Nana (7 cuties) and Benedictine Monastic is apparent in her presentations.
Come away, ponder what God is calling you to explore this season of blessed expectation.
Attendance is limited.Register early
Cost is $50.00 (to include a light lunch). A portion of your fee will be donated to Women’s Hope of Auburn.
Ask about our special Mother/daughter discount.
Limited scholarships available.
*This retreat is also available at your site.
For more information and to register, contact Kate at
(334)332-7729 or ammakate@gmail.com
Five Year Old Eyes
"I want to be a child again. I want to see the world with five year old eyes"
These lines are taking from a tape from The Benedictines in Pecos, New Mexico. But what does this line mean? What are five year old eyes?
These lines are taking from a tape from The Benedictines in Pecos, New Mexico. But what does this line mean? What are five year old eyes?
Let's examine that concept.
For a five year old in Amma Kate's family (and hopefully yours), it means birthday parties, grandparents and parents who love them, extended families for support in difficult times, it means a typical middle class upbringing that includes proper nutrition, predictable consequences to problems and never a sleepless night due to homelessness, abuse, terrorism attacks, murdered or maimed parents or siblings, starvation or poverty.
In Northern Uganda, a five year old is subject to horrific harm. Terrorist come regularly to the homes of children, killing the parents, mutilating the children, murdering babies (for target practice) and kidnapping boys to be child soldiers and girls concubines. The children to be stolen are often made to do the killing and mutilating of their own family members. Children, somehow left, become the NightWalkers. They must walk miles and miles every night for a safe place in which to sleep. And then they walk back home the next day. This has been allowed to continue for over 20 years.
In South America, many poor children live with their family in garbage dumps. Even for the most hearty of us, the smell alone is beyond words to describe.
In the United States, thousands a year won't live to have five year old eyes as they will be aborted. Over 45 million abortions have been performed since Roe v. Wade in 1973. Typical reasons given for abortion is inconvenient timing for the mother. In America, 3,700 babies are aborted every single day. And contrary to the popular cry that abortion be available for cases of rape or incest, pregnancy rarely results.
In our country, child abuse has reached an epidemic proportion.
In countless countries of our world, five year old eyes see daily violence and violent death.
SO,
It appears that someone must stand in the gap for all of children. The children are our future. They will be the one's to inherent not only our greatness but also our problems. And who better to stand in the GAP for them but grandmas, nanas, mimis, me-mows and those with a grandmother's heart.
We must come together prayerfully and stand in the gap for the children.
We must pray for leaders that are child aware.
We must pray for children like Noah, who is autistic, and his beloved parents.
We must pray for the "atonement" babies (the child born after a mother has had an abortion) for they inherit incredible expectations.
We must pray for children like Loren who was born with serious birth defects.
We must pray for children like Joe, who was adopted from a third world country and has many challenges.
We must pray for all the children born without the ability to form emotional attachments. If left unhealed and untreated, they will be doomed to a life of violent acts harming themselves and others.
We must pray.
We must pray.
We must pray.
We must pray.
And NOW.
If you have a heart of love for children. If you have a child in need of prayer. Or if you just want more information, please call or write Kate+. Your prayer requests will remain confidential. And your need will be prayed for every day by women called by God pray for the children.
CONTACT
(c)Community of Peace,Order of St. Alcuin 2004
Grandparents at Prayer Mission and Vision
VISION AND MISSION OF
Grandparents At Prayer (GAP)
at Multi-Generational Family Faithfulness
It is the prayerful Vision of Grandparents At Prayer that a large army of praying women will accept His Call to intercede on behalf of God’s children. In our chaotic & sometimes violent world, God is rising up a spirited group of prayerful warriors to intercede and thereby decrease the plight of the vulnerable among God’s children.
Grandparents At Prayer (GAP)
at Multi-Generational Family Faithfulness
It is the prayerful Vision of Grandparents At Prayer that a large army of praying women will accept His Call to intercede on behalf of God’s children. In our chaotic & sometimes violent world, God is rising up a spirited group of prayerful warriors to intercede and thereby decrease the plight of the vulnerable among God’s children.
Our Mission comes out of the vision to develop communities of prayer. In assisting spirit-filled women of prayer to seek and accept God’s call, these communities of Intercessional Prayer will act on behalf of God’s most vulnerable children. It is the intention of GAP to develop appropriate programs of in-reach and outreach as the call of God indicates.
Do you have a listening heart?
Do you have a Godly love for children?
Are you called to a life that includes prayer?
Do you have a listening heart?
Do you have a Godly love for children?
Are you called to a life that includes prayer?
Do you have a heart to reach out to both the Churched and unChurched.
Contact
Strength For the Journey
There are times in our mortal season on earth when we just have to pull back, take a break, continue to remember to breath and then move into the direction God seems to be calling our name. Several of us are there right now.
Several years ago, three sisters were inspired to have a retreat.
One retreat.
One weekend retreat.
Well, that little weekend is now is several states. One sister felt called to build a retreat center on the old family farm. Others joined the sisters as team members in various locations. It was as if the teams formed before we knew we were a team.
What started out as a little inspiration seems to have been given a life of it's own by the Holy Spirit. We are now anticipating weekend 5 here in Bama. An occasional "reunion" was pondered. We try to get together quarterly.
Well.....that sneaky Holy Spirit seems to have pulled a fast one on the Alabama Strength for the Journey group.
We drive one another to chemo. We pray with one another. We take communion as we are able together. Dear Laura calls everybody dutifully. And we accept each other at whatever place she presents.
We are small, large (I prefer my granddaughter's term "fluffy"), white, black, members of a denomination or not, haven't been to a church in a long time, some have financial security,most have none, some are in treatment, some have stopped treatment or are in experimental trials abroad. Some are in remission. Some on chemo for life. Some come for solace during family problems, deaths of a loved one, diseased that don't kill but totally rearrange one's life.
It just doesn't matter. We are all the Alabama women of Strength for the Journey.
I am the privileged to be the Celebrant at the closing Liturgy. If that was the only time I Consecrated every year, I would know God called me for a purpose. Such a sacred and holy moment in our collective lives. To be in the midst of the cloud of witnesses and see how the Holy Spirit has touched them can not be put into words.
No one had a five year plan. We have no funding source per say (there are some gracious givers). There isn't an organizational chart other than the three biological sisters are the final say. I'm pretty sure the three sisters had no idea that this would grow like sacred kudzoo. It surely has a life of its own drawn and nourished by the Holy Spirit. We never know how many repeaters there will be until one registers and who and how a new sister will appear. It isn't until the Friday we begin that we know we can pay the retreat center bill. And on at least one occasions, major presentors were "ifee" due to a medical problem that miraculously (I use this term specifically and not casually) disappeared.
And you know what...it works much better that way! We have a tentative plan, throw out the word, pray that the ones He wants to come do come. And pray the money works so we are able to pay the bill at the Retreat Center that host us each year thus far. And those of us that come exhausted, seem to have a Divine infusion of energy to be His vessel.
And it happens. Year after year....site after site...need after need. Each group seems to move into its own "personality". Our Alabama Journey sure does!!
To Him be the glory, and to Beth, Anne and Laura the graces and blessings to have said "yes".
Strength for the Journey is their Magnificat.
And God has kindly called a few of us to come along with them.
And for that I am ever so grateful, humbled, mystified and engaged
--
Several years ago, three sisters were inspired to have a retreat.
One retreat.
One weekend retreat.
Well, that little weekend is now is several states. One sister felt called to build a retreat center on the old family farm. Others joined the sisters as team members in various locations. It was as if the teams formed before we knew we were a team.
What started out as a little inspiration seems to have been given a life of it's own by the Holy Spirit. We are now anticipating weekend 5 here in Bama. An occasional "reunion" was pondered. We try to get together quarterly.
Well.....that sneaky Holy Spirit seems to have pulled a fast one on the Alabama Strength for the Journey group.
We drive one another to chemo. We pray with one another. We take communion as we are able together. Dear Laura calls everybody dutifully. And we accept each other at whatever place she presents.
We are small, large (I prefer my granddaughter's term "fluffy"), white, black, members of a denomination or not, haven't been to a church in a long time, some have financial security,most have none, some are in treatment, some have stopped treatment or are in experimental trials abroad. Some are in remission. Some on chemo for life. Some come for solace during family problems, deaths of a loved one, diseased that don't kill but totally rearrange one's life.
It just doesn't matter. We are all the Alabama women of Strength for the Journey.
I am the privileged to be the Celebrant at the closing Liturgy. If that was the only time I Consecrated every year, I would know God called me for a purpose. Such a sacred and holy moment in our collective lives. To be in the midst of the cloud of witnesses and see how the Holy Spirit has touched them can not be put into words.
No one had a five year plan. We have no funding source per say (there are some gracious givers). There isn't an organizational chart other than the three biological sisters are the final say. I'm pretty sure the three sisters had no idea that this would grow like sacred kudzoo. It surely has a life of its own drawn and nourished by the Holy Spirit. We never know how many repeaters there will be until one registers and who and how a new sister will appear. It isn't until the Friday we begin that we know we can pay the retreat center bill. And on at least one occasions, major presentors were "ifee" due to a medical problem that miraculously (I use this term specifically and not casually) disappeared.
And you know what...it works much better that way! We have a tentative plan, throw out the word, pray that the ones He wants to come do come. And pray the money works so we are able to pay the bill at the Retreat Center that host us each year thus far. And those of us that come exhausted, seem to have a Divine infusion of energy to be His vessel.
And it happens. Year after year....site after site...need after need. Each group seems to move into its own "personality". Our Alabama Journey sure does!!
To Him be the glory, and to Beth, Anne and Laura the graces and blessings to have said "yes".
Strength for the Journey is their Magnificat.
And God has kindly called a few of us to come along with them.
And for that I am ever so grateful, humbled, mystified and engaged
--
Saturday, October 4, 2008
The Bigger Picture
Are you reeling from the National, Religious and Global events?
I am.
Many have been assimilating the various news events as they effect all of us. There are abundant "consultants" and "experts" telling us how to think, feel and act. But what is the cumulative spiritual fallout? Adverse events can have a gift and a lesson if noticed and processed. If taken independently, all the recent problems are worth contemplating. Taken as items on a continuum, all the appearingly disjointed threads become a tapestry. The tapestry produced is not pretty. Both the individual events and the cumulative picture best be alarming to anyone interested in families and the survival of our culture.
Let me explain.....
A few of the many events I speak of are:
The Wall Street/ Corporate financial disasters have resulted in gross losses to a myriad of people. Our Government has authorized a bailout package that includes protecting foreign countries losses. Naturally, more continued to be added to the bill to assist favored legislator's desires.
Lehman Brothers CEO's "average" hourly wage (when adding compensations over his tenure there) of $17,000 per hour . No, this is not a typo, nor have you misread the number. He received this astronomical compensation while driving the previously successful 158 year old company into oblivion. On the (weekend)eve of the collapse, a very long line of stretch limos still utilized by the overpaid managers sat running with a driver present. The business agenda of these overpaid, incompetent business gurus seems to have been fed by their addiction to "OPM", that is "other people's money".
The attack on "Sarah" Palin to "choose" to deliver a Down's Syndrome child and who will take care of "her" children if elected has become a war cry. Those adverse to her right to accept this child also have bemoaned the "cost of his care" to the taxpayer. A new Pandora's box of controversial opinions on "choice" has been let loose with very little or any opposition.
Prince Phillip (of England)'s interview stating that the "food shortage" is because "people have too many children".
The Episcopal Church's House of Bishops' decision to depose dear Pittsburgh Bishop Robert Duncan. This action was taken despite the many deviations and illegal procedural items. And this, after the request heard at Lambeth to have a moratorium on these persecutions and civil lawsuits.
The continued evolution and celebration of a continuum of Lesbian, Gay, Transsexual and Bi-sexual (LGBT) civil rights and "Church/Marital" "rights". These demands go well beyond human rights. In the extreme, a transgendered (female to male) person, choosing to retain the uterus delivered a child through insemination. As the individual had a bilateral mastectomy for the "gender re-asignment", his/her female partner then took over the breastfeeding. The entire episode was recorded, discussed and largely celebrated as a model for alternative family formation.
More than one mainline religious bodies have begun to revise their denominational concept of God and salvation. These "revisions" include negating basic Christian foundational concepts as fundamental as the Resurrection, the validity and supremacy of the Bible and the sanctity of marriage and life.
Daily it becomes increasingly challenging for individual population groups to have affordable housing, medical care, stable income, or a quality education. Falling on hard times is seen as a personal flaw and not a societal issue. One need only look at the now plummeting housing market including foreclosures to see greed, unscrupulous lending procedures and the equivalent of the Golden Calf.
The Episcopal Bishop of Washington (DC) initiating a civil suit against a very successful, long standing downtown DC Mission. The Mission is in the process of "trading" buildings with the city. This trade will enable the Mission to expand necessary services. Bishop Chane, two others and the ACLU cite the Mission's mandate that clients attend religious services as problematic and a violation of the division of Church and State.
Unmarried theatrical couple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are been cited as a "perfect family model". This judgement is due to their individual wealth, children (both biological and adopted), good looks and astronomical wealth. They and other similar individuals, couples and families are presented as role models to our children and youth.
No Child Left Behind continues to fling out unprepared children right and left as it spirals out of control. Competent, dedicated educators flee or retire as soon as possible in many communities. The Education Department of California has released a report with an absurd and embarrassing percentage of students not finishing high school. School teachers in one Texas School District are now allowed to be armed.
A recent report from the The Barma Group cites extremely troubling statistics. In addition to the many problematic behaviors, the document reports that 38% of those polled (under age 25) admitted to infidelities. Pornography use was reported in 19% in those polled over 25. In the under 25 population polled, 26% admitted to the use of pornography.
Barma doesn't delve into the new terminologies that include "friends with (sexual) benefits" or "hooking up" for indiscriminate sex. These two dangerous behaviors are rampant in our culture, especially among the young. The report leaves to other investigators to look at the veracity of the idea presented in many areas of our culture that all sexual behaviors, not including intercourse, keeps the young woman's chastity intact.
The continuing and seemingly epidemic increase of family and serial child abuse has been the profitable fodder of many new forensic entertainment series. Abuses seem to be escalating in severity, recidivism and often conclude in the death of a child. Known repetitive abusers as well as child homicide perpetrators are released after short prison sentences into an unknowing community in record numbers. And the age of these predators in diminishing to include young people having already offended in a serious physical assault prior adolescence.
In annotating these recent news events, does a picture begins to form?
While this laundry list of issues and events may resemble a child's "what doesn't belong" exercise, I would submit to you they all belong. It is by the synthesis of all these concomitant events that we are able to see a sharp focus on causation. This author views the world through a prism of Biblical values, Family systems, conflict resolution/reconciliation, and history. Marriage to a forest economics trained professional adds a dimension of natural and logical consequences when not adhering to environmental laws or mores.
In reviewing my old (and I am old) history lessons, if one forgets history, it will repeat. Only by learning old lessons and adapting them to current events do we avoid the same consequences. If not re-mediated, the lesson will come time and time again.
The first world is referred to as "postmodern". Is it? Current news manifests a very ancient thinking. While we have many modern "things", our lifestyle and mindset is quite ancient. Ponder the times the world has operated on a "if it feels good, do it" mentality. The "end justifies the means" thinking is a historical one. The "Rules" don't apply to those in power has been seen time and time again. Spinning the facts to justify one's one agenda is a re-occurring theme in history.
Historically, when rules, morality, procedures and the emphasis on quality of life for the vulnerable (children, elderly, ill,or disabled) was not important (or was even legislated against), culture deteriorated. And this mindset seems to have reared it's ugly head again. When were times when the "winner" or the idolized (yes, I did use that word) were the ones with the most "stuff", including power, possessions, strength or education?
If your answer includes the ancient Romans, the ancient Greeks, or other powerful entities that overtook others but literally crumbled and disappeared, we are beginning to see the same pattern. You see, systems unhealed will rotate again and again. Some even posit that the repeated patterns alters DNA. Surely this is the case with the fact the "weak" are factored out by annihilation.
The Good News tells us "in God, all things are possible". If we take our circumstances as an opportunity to learn, a gift appears. With God's grace, forgiveness and our conversion, we move from fear to love. This enables our worst weakness, sin, ill or disaster may be transformed to an asset.
For Bible based solutions, I am also reminded of the condition of the world when St. Benedict wrote his Rule for the Order of St. Benedict. The Benedictines, in some opinions, are credited with saving civilization during his time and the middle ages. It is applicable today. Benedict not only recognized the needs but cared for the abandoned, the young and elderly. Benedictine community leaders are held to a higher standard of behavior. Vows of Obedience to the Bible, the Rule and the Community; Stability to place and call; and Ongoing Conversion from fear to love certainly sound appropriate for inclusion in any reasonable spiritual formation.
Through the centuries, many wise, profound men and women acted out of care for their fellow man without thinking of themselves. Were these extraordinary people? Some surely were extraordinary. But most were common people who cared deeply about those God gave them to love.
What negative common variable resulted in the demise of most (if not all) the now dead empires? What came even before loss of the rules, mores and expectation of common decency toward one another developed? At what point did the "slippery slope" begin to gain momentum? At what nanosecond in time, did blinders go in place, thereby, making it common and permissible to trample those in the way of one's goal?
I would humbly submit to you that it was the fall of the family and the importance of children within it. This is whether one looks at an intact nuclear family, a single parent family, a blended family or a group functioning as a family "of choice" in the absence of a bonded family. When "things" got more important than God and His children, our society took a deliberate step into a crash course with trouble.
This is not a condemnation on differently configured families. It does mean that children and families must be intentional. They must be included in our process of making decisions. In Benedictine Communities, all have voice with vowed members having voice and vote. If we make decisions that shape quality character, a loving heart and sound decision making skills, we ensure our own future. If not, Malachi's prophetic words recycle into our century.
As said in the Old Testament ends with the Book of Malachi, our Father sends the Prophet Elijah. Elijah comes before the "great and dreadful day the Lord comes"(4;5) in judgement. Malachi goes on the tell us that in neglecting to teach the generations the spiritual desires of the Lord, we invoke natural consequences. I would submit to you that the consequences of this evil include failure, pain, addiction, short-sightedness, idolatry, insecurity and loss. And because we have returned to behave as in those ancient times, the consequences are the same.
When one reads Deuteronomy 6:1-9, we see the mind of the Father as to the teaching of our children and grandchildren that will alleviate the above stated problems. We need only seek the long term solution, not a quick fix that "feels good". Biblical road maps to sane, healthy living abound. We see many opportunities to God's urging that we tell the future generations of His wonderfulness. We are promised the fruits of the spirit for upright living.
Corrie Ten Boon, a Christian who survived Nazi concentration camps wrote, "is prayer your steering wheel or your spare tire?".
A recent Reuters article reported numerous Wall Streeters, Financial CEOs and the like were seen in the pews at a local Church. They were in varying states of coming apart at the spiritual, emotional and physical seams. The article appeared to be an example of using the Lord as a miraculous spare tire needed to "fix" the man made financial disaster.. . . quickly. This is reminiscent of the behaviors on and shortly after 9/11. Many then discussed changing priorities, putting family and friends above corporate agendas. Reports of highly paid executives re-thinking their hours away from significant relationships abounded. Churches reported record attendance....for a short period of time.
For my grandmother Katherine, who grew up in a very poor home, survived the "great" depression and buried most of her siblings, in laws, husband (of 49 yrs) and only child (my Mom), prayer wasn't an elective behavior. She prayed for every one of us, especially her grandchildren, every day. Not in that obnoxious way some do in restaurants loudly so that everyone knows how religious they are, but in her own quiet, determined and dedicated way. My entire life, I saw her prayer beads sitting next to her. At home, they sat on a small table next to her favorite chair. In the nursing home, her bedside table. We were a gift from the Father and she was intentional in her care, support, prayer and walking testimony. Before we were able to read The Holy Scripture, she was the Bible we saw. In that manner, she fulfilled God's declaration that "so you, your children and their children" will know Me. My children's children know I am a praying grandmother (Nana). They know examples of long term praying for the needs of the family. Was Gram perfect? Not by a long shot. Am I, not even in the ball park. But she showed us faithfulness. She showed us the value of family by sharing familial stories that taught biblical values. We continue to heal the (DNA) brokenness of our family. She and so many others showed/modeled how to make secular decisions based on short and long term biblical consequences and rewards. They passed on a vision that is disappearing in America.
I, would submit to the reader, that unless our culture turns to the Holy, we are doomed to repeat the problems of extinct cultures. It is our choice. Do we emulate behaviors that have a long term healthy outcome or continue to only look for quick fixes? Do we sleep in on Sundays or play golf rather than expose ourselves to meaningful worship and ongoing spiritual development? Are we committed to affirm and empower young families in the development of virtue alongside financial security? Do we expect all our children's spiritual development to be the responsibility of a 45 minute ministry someone else teaches? When picked up our children from a youth event or vacation Bible school, is our first and possible only question asked "Did you have fun" rather than "what did you learn today?" Do you have a spiritual vision of what you want for your children's future? It is not evil to want them to be financially successful, marry attractive people, drive a nice car and live in a well manicured neighborhood. But those are earthly goals. What are your eternal goals/expectations for them? How can God's design for multi-generational families be integrated into your plans, choices and decisions for your family, finances, housing, business, other earthly affairs and eternal reward?
It is up to us individually and collectively. Multi-generational family faithfulness is not a new fad concept. It isn't a new "designer" workshop. Multi-generational family faithfulness was the first centuries "school of the Lord's service" as St. Benedict wrote. The Great Commission to make believers of all nations began in the home. The Book of Matthew admonishes us to Seek the Lord first, and then all will be given. We have many incidents and formulas for reconciliation. We are also told to break with the unrepentant.
For me and my family, we choose to serve the Lord. And we attempt it in a multi-generational family faithfulness manner as the early Christian communities did. Are we religious zealots, not by any measure. Are we riddled with "human failings"? Oh yeah!!! Some more than others!! But we "do small things with great love" as Mother Theresa urged.
Is this simple, humble piece of pondering the entire answer? No, it is a jumping off point. It is a pondering of a grandmother that wants my 3 week old grandson and his six cousins to have a good life here and an eternal reward.
It is up to all of us how history remembers the 21st century. As for my family, we are taking Biblical driving lessons so as to maximize our steering of the generations.
I am.
Many have been assimilating the various news events as they effect all of us. There are abundant "consultants" and "experts" telling us how to think, feel and act. But what is the cumulative spiritual fallout? Adverse events can have a gift and a lesson if noticed and processed. If taken independently, all the recent problems are worth contemplating. Taken as items on a continuum, all the appearingly disjointed threads become a tapestry. The tapestry produced is not pretty. Both the individual events and the cumulative picture best be alarming to anyone interested in families and the survival of our culture.
Let me explain.....
A few of the many events I speak of are:
The Wall Street/ Corporate financial disasters have resulted in gross losses to a myriad of people. Our Government has authorized a bailout package that includes protecting foreign countries losses. Naturally, more continued to be added to the bill to assist favored legislator's desires.
Lehman Brothers CEO's "average" hourly wage (when adding compensations over his tenure there) of $17,000 per hour . No, this is not a typo, nor have you misread the number. He received this astronomical compensation while driving the previously successful 158 year old company into oblivion. On the (weekend)eve of the collapse, a very long line of stretch limos still utilized by the overpaid managers sat running with a driver present. The business agenda of these overpaid, incompetent business gurus seems to have been fed by their addiction to "OPM", that is "other people's money".
The attack on "Sarah" Palin to "choose" to deliver a Down's Syndrome child and who will take care of "her" children if elected has become a war cry. Those adverse to her right to accept this child also have bemoaned the "cost of his care" to the taxpayer. A new Pandora's box of controversial opinions on "choice" has been let loose with very little or any opposition.
Prince Phillip (of England)'s interview stating that the "food shortage" is because "people have too many children".
The Episcopal Church's House of Bishops' decision to depose dear Pittsburgh Bishop Robert Duncan. This action was taken despite the many deviations and illegal procedural items. And this, after the request heard at Lambeth to have a moratorium on these persecutions and civil lawsuits.
The continued evolution and celebration of a continuum of Lesbian, Gay, Transsexual and Bi-sexual (LGBT) civil rights and "Church/Marital" "rights". These demands go well beyond human rights. In the extreme, a transgendered (female to male) person, choosing to retain the uterus delivered a child through insemination. As the individual had a bilateral mastectomy for the "gender re-asignment", his/her female partner then took over the breastfeeding. The entire episode was recorded, discussed and largely celebrated as a model for alternative family formation.
More than one mainline religious bodies have begun to revise their denominational concept of God and salvation. These "revisions" include negating basic Christian foundational concepts as fundamental as the Resurrection, the validity and supremacy of the Bible and the sanctity of marriage and life.
Daily it becomes increasingly challenging for individual population groups to have affordable housing, medical care, stable income, or a quality education. Falling on hard times is seen as a personal flaw and not a societal issue. One need only look at the now plummeting housing market including foreclosures to see greed, unscrupulous lending procedures and the equivalent of the Golden Calf.
The Episcopal Bishop of Washington (DC) initiating a civil suit against a very successful, long standing downtown DC Mission. The Mission is in the process of "trading" buildings with the city. This trade will enable the Mission to expand necessary services. Bishop Chane, two others and the ACLU cite the Mission's mandate that clients attend religious services as problematic and a violation of the division of Church and State.
Unmarried theatrical couple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are been cited as a "perfect family model". This judgement is due to their individual wealth, children (both biological and adopted), good looks and astronomical wealth. They and other similar individuals, couples and families are presented as role models to our children and youth.
No Child Left Behind continues to fling out unprepared children right and left as it spirals out of control. Competent, dedicated educators flee or retire as soon as possible in many communities. The Education Department of California has released a report with an absurd and embarrassing percentage of students not finishing high school. School teachers in one Texas School District are now allowed to be armed.
A recent report from the The Barma Group cites extremely troubling statistics. In addition to the many problematic behaviors, the document reports that 38% of those polled (under age 25) admitted to infidelities. Pornography use was reported in 19% in those polled over 25. In the under 25 population polled, 26% admitted to the use of pornography.
Barma doesn't delve into the new terminologies that include "friends with (sexual) benefits" or "hooking up" for indiscriminate sex. These two dangerous behaviors are rampant in our culture, especially among the young. The report leaves to other investigators to look at the veracity of the idea presented in many areas of our culture that all sexual behaviors, not including intercourse, keeps the young woman's chastity intact.
The continuing and seemingly epidemic increase of family and serial child abuse has been the profitable fodder of many new forensic entertainment series. Abuses seem to be escalating in severity, recidivism and often conclude in the death of a child. Known repetitive abusers as well as child homicide perpetrators are released after short prison sentences into an unknowing community in record numbers. And the age of these predators in diminishing to include young people having already offended in a serious physical assault prior adolescence.
In annotating these recent news events, does a picture begins to form?
While this laundry list of issues and events may resemble a child's "what doesn't belong" exercise, I would submit to you they all belong. It is by the synthesis of all these concomitant events that we are able to see a sharp focus on causation. This author views the world through a prism of Biblical values, Family systems, conflict resolution/reconciliation, and history. Marriage to a forest economics trained professional adds a dimension of natural and logical consequences when not adhering to environmental laws or mores.
In reviewing my old (and I am old) history lessons, if one forgets history, it will repeat. Only by learning old lessons and adapting them to current events do we avoid the same consequences. If not re-mediated, the lesson will come time and time again.
The first world is referred to as "postmodern". Is it? Current news manifests a very ancient thinking. While we have many modern "things", our lifestyle and mindset is quite ancient. Ponder the times the world has operated on a "if it feels good, do it" mentality. The "end justifies the means" thinking is a historical one. The "Rules" don't apply to those in power has been seen time and time again. Spinning the facts to justify one's one agenda is a re-occurring theme in history.
Historically, when rules, morality, procedures and the emphasis on quality of life for the vulnerable (children, elderly, ill,or disabled) was not important (or was even legislated against), culture deteriorated. And this mindset seems to have reared it's ugly head again. When were times when the "winner" or the idolized (yes, I did use that word) were the ones with the most "stuff", including power, possessions, strength or education?
If your answer includes the ancient Romans, the ancient Greeks, or other powerful entities that overtook others but literally crumbled and disappeared, we are beginning to see the same pattern. You see, systems unhealed will rotate again and again. Some even posit that the repeated patterns alters DNA. Surely this is the case with the fact the "weak" are factored out by annihilation.
The Good News tells us "in God, all things are possible". If we take our circumstances as an opportunity to learn, a gift appears. With God's grace, forgiveness and our conversion, we move from fear to love. This enables our worst weakness, sin, ill or disaster may be transformed to an asset.
For Bible based solutions, I am also reminded of the condition of the world when St. Benedict wrote his Rule for the Order of St. Benedict. The Benedictines, in some opinions, are credited with saving civilization during his time and the middle ages. It is applicable today. Benedict not only recognized the needs but cared for the abandoned, the young and elderly. Benedictine community leaders are held to a higher standard of behavior. Vows of Obedience to the Bible, the Rule and the Community; Stability to place and call; and Ongoing Conversion from fear to love certainly sound appropriate for inclusion in any reasonable spiritual formation.
Through the centuries, many wise, profound men and women acted out of care for their fellow man without thinking of themselves. Were these extraordinary people? Some surely were extraordinary. But most were common people who cared deeply about those God gave them to love.
What negative common variable resulted in the demise of most (if not all) the now dead empires? What came even before loss of the rules, mores and expectation of common decency toward one another developed? At what point did the "slippery slope" begin to gain momentum? At what nanosecond in time, did blinders go in place, thereby, making it common and permissible to trample those in the way of one's goal?
I would humbly submit to you that it was the fall of the family and the importance of children within it. This is whether one looks at an intact nuclear family, a single parent family, a blended family or a group functioning as a family "of choice" in the absence of a bonded family. When "things" got more important than God and His children, our society took a deliberate step into a crash course with trouble.
This is not a condemnation on differently configured families. It does mean that children and families must be intentional. They must be included in our process of making decisions. In Benedictine Communities, all have voice with vowed members having voice and vote. If we make decisions that shape quality character, a loving heart and sound decision making skills, we ensure our own future. If not, Malachi's prophetic words recycle into our century.
As said in the Old Testament ends with the Book of Malachi, our Father sends the Prophet Elijah. Elijah comes before the "great and dreadful day the Lord comes"(4;5) in judgement. Malachi goes on the tell us that in neglecting to teach the generations the spiritual desires of the Lord, we invoke natural consequences. I would submit to you that the consequences of this evil include failure, pain, addiction, short-sightedness, idolatry, insecurity and loss. And because we have returned to behave as in those ancient times, the consequences are the same.
When one reads Deuteronomy 6:1-9, we see the mind of the Father as to the teaching of our children and grandchildren that will alleviate the above stated problems. We need only seek the long term solution, not a quick fix that "feels good". Biblical road maps to sane, healthy living abound. We see many opportunities to God's urging that we tell the future generations of His wonderfulness. We are promised the fruits of the spirit for upright living.
Corrie Ten Boon, a Christian who survived Nazi concentration camps wrote, "is prayer your steering wheel or your spare tire?".
A recent Reuters article reported numerous Wall Streeters, Financial CEOs and the like were seen in the pews at a local Church. They were in varying states of coming apart at the spiritual, emotional and physical seams. The article appeared to be an example of using the Lord as a miraculous spare tire needed to "fix" the man made financial disaster.. . . quickly. This is reminiscent of the behaviors on and shortly after 9/11. Many then discussed changing priorities, putting family and friends above corporate agendas. Reports of highly paid executives re-thinking their hours away from significant relationships abounded. Churches reported record attendance....for a short period of time.
For my grandmother Katherine, who grew up in a very poor home, survived the "great" depression and buried most of her siblings, in laws, husband (of 49 yrs) and only child (my Mom), prayer wasn't an elective behavior. She prayed for every one of us, especially her grandchildren, every day. Not in that obnoxious way some do in restaurants loudly so that everyone knows how religious they are, but in her own quiet, determined and dedicated way. My entire life, I saw her prayer beads sitting next to her. At home, they sat on a small table next to her favorite chair. In the nursing home, her bedside table. We were a gift from the Father and she was intentional in her care, support, prayer and walking testimony. Before we were able to read The Holy Scripture, she was the Bible we saw. In that manner, she fulfilled God's declaration that "so you, your children and their children" will know Me. My children's children know I am a praying grandmother (Nana). They know examples of long term praying for the needs of the family. Was Gram perfect? Not by a long shot. Am I, not even in the ball park. But she showed us faithfulness. She showed us the value of family by sharing familial stories that taught biblical values. We continue to heal the (DNA) brokenness of our family. She and so many others showed/modeled how to make secular decisions based on short and long term biblical consequences and rewards. They passed on a vision that is disappearing in America.
I, would submit to the reader, that unless our culture turns to the Holy, we are doomed to repeat the problems of extinct cultures. It is our choice. Do we emulate behaviors that have a long term healthy outcome or continue to only look for quick fixes? Do we sleep in on Sundays or play golf rather than expose ourselves to meaningful worship and ongoing spiritual development? Are we committed to affirm and empower young families in the development of virtue alongside financial security? Do we expect all our children's spiritual development to be the responsibility of a 45 minute ministry someone else teaches? When picked up our children from a youth event or vacation Bible school, is our first and possible only question asked "Did you have fun" rather than "what did you learn today?" Do you have a spiritual vision of what you want for your children's future? It is not evil to want them to be financially successful, marry attractive people, drive a nice car and live in a well manicured neighborhood. But those are earthly goals. What are your eternal goals/expectations for them? How can God's design for multi-generational families be integrated into your plans, choices and decisions for your family, finances, housing, business, other earthly affairs and eternal reward?
It is up to us individually and collectively. Multi-generational family faithfulness is not a new fad concept. It isn't a new "designer" workshop. Multi-generational family faithfulness was the first centuries "school of the Lord's service" as St. Benedict wrote. The Great Commission to make believers of all nations began in the home. The Book of Matthew admonishes us to Seek the Lord first, and then all will be given. We have many incidents and formulas for reconciliation. We are also told to break with the unrepentant.
For me and my family, we choose to serve the Lord. And we attempt it in a multi-generational family faithfulness manner as the early Christian communities did. Are we religious zealots, not by any measure. Are we riddled with "human failings"? Oh yeah!!! Some more than others!! But we "do small things with great love" as Mother Theresa urged.
Is this simple, humble piece of pondering the entire answer? No, it is a jumping off point. It is a pondering of a grandmother that wants my 3 week old grandson and his six cousins to have a good life here and an eternal reward.
It is up to all of us how history remembers the 21st century. As for my family, we are taking Biblical driving lessons so as to maximize our steering of the generations.
To God be the Glory, Amen.
The Rev. Mtr. Katherine Mary Martin, OSA is a Third Order (disbursed) Benedictine with the Order of St. Alcuin, a Religious Order of CANA, an individual clergy member of the Anglican Communion Network, Southeastern Convocation and Canonically resident of the Anglican Province of Christ the Good Shepherd. Kate+ is a Licensed Certified Social Worker(LCSW) with Private Independent Practitioner certification in Administration, Casemanagement and Clinical Practice. In addition to being a wife, mother/stepmother of 6 adult sons, five daughters-in laws, and 7 grandchildren, she is active in ministry affirming and empowering multi-generational family faithfulness with Holy Family Ministries.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Looking for Gratitude
Wow,
What a day Monday was for me and the family! A great weekend with kids and grand kids home. Stephen, his Mom and Richard even were able to take Bruster's ice cream to "Gammy" on Saturday night at her apartment in town. She really enjoyed that and Stephen has had a special bond with her since he was very little. For those with kids and grand kids, if you know someone or are related to a senior citizen in a senior living arrangement, please take little ones by as often as you are able. As my dear sister in law says, it is usually "gray haired people going to see older, more gray people". Our little cutester has developed a reputation over there and can even melt the most disagreeable.
Worship Sunday after teaching Visionary Parenting was followed by dinner at one of our favorite restaurants before the kids spread for their home destinations. Ah, another weekend of blessings. Including the blessing of quiet after all the grace filled noise.
Then the Monday from battery hell.....
First the car battery was as dead as a post. Richard coming to save me (he saves me from myself often) by jump starting the battery. Experience has taught me to let it run, drive a bit longer than the plan had been and end up at the Auto repair store. You guessed it. As soon as I turned the car off and tried to start it again...nada, nix, nothing. Ninety-five dollars later, and armed with a new battery, I made my way to AT and T to get a new battery for my Blackberry. It had also lost its will to serve.
My favorite two ladies weren't there, so I relented for the new guy. Didn't have a lot of time. Oh, did I tell you that I had a hot date for lunch and cavity fillings with my favorite 89 year old in town..."Gammy". She dislikes dental appointments with a renewed passion. I knew she'd be oh so glad to reschedule if I "needed to". So, when Junior told me my Blackberry was "so old" they didn't carry or make my battery anymore, I knew it was a message from God.
For twenty dollars more than a new BB, I now am learning to use an IPhone.
By now, I was within 3 minutes of late to pick up my mother in law. So off I sped to Monarch. We had a great lunch...how she does love a cup of soup and a grilled cheese at a neighborhood deli! And the infamous dental appointment went off without a hitch. Dr. Rearden knows she is deaf, doesn't wear her hearing aids, has become adverse to dental work and sitting still that long in the chair terrorizes her back. He is a saint among us as he bellowed how well she was doing over and over again. I wrote the check for the repairs as she was in need of a better chair for a moment. Writing checks that expensive also attacks her frugal mind. We had a great talk on the way home as she is most appreciative of the smallest of our gifts of time and energy.
And then it hit. "It" was gratitude. She mentioned being grateful for all the times her dear husband did extra so she'd be "OK, if he left first". From the grave, my father-in-law was continuing to be the consummate teacher, husband and family man. The Chemist and the Librarian who raised four kids in Oak Ridge, Tenn., took in her Mom and step dad when living in Maine was too expensive and loved everyone God gave them to love as best anyone is able still passes on a legacy of love, commitment and joy in small and large things.
At that moment, 'it" made me laugh out loud. Not wanting my dear mother in law to think I'd gone mad, I quickly shared my epiphany......"Thank God I don't have a pacemaker!!!!" With all the batteries that had died in the last day, "thank God I don't have to wear a pacemaker". As I write this on Wednesday afternoon, I am still smiling as I write this. Naturally, more gratitude crept in, so the list now includes:
"things" broke not people;
we had the money to make to repairs;
the car didn't die with Mom or one of the grand babies in the car;
my sons are all jealous now that (their)Mom has an iPhone;
I was able to go to the (paid, mileage reimbursement, lunch and free Continuing Educ. Units for my social work license) meeting in Montgomery Tuesday and the car started like it had a brand new battery:
Richard is still one of the loveliest gifts God has ever given me;
and
I don't wear a pacemaker.
Blessings,
k+
j
What a day Monday was for me and the family! A great weekend with kids and grand kids home. Stephen, his Mom and Richard even were able to take Bruster's ice cream to "Gammy" on Saturday night at her apartment in town. She really enjoyed that and Stephen has had a special bond with her since he was very little. For those with kids and grand kids, if you know someone or are related to a senior citizen in a senior living arrangement, please take little ones by as often as you are able. As my dear sister in law says, it is usually "gray haired people going to see older, more gray people". Our little cutester has developed a reputation over there and can even melt the most disagreeable.
Worship Sunday after teaching Visionary Parenting was followed by dinner at one of our favorite restaurants before the kids spread for their home destinations. Ah, another weekend of blessings. Including the blessing of quiet after all the grace filled noise.
Then the Monday from battery hell.....
First the car battery was as dead as a post. Richard coming to save me (he saves me from myself often) by jump starting the battery. Experience has taught me to let it run, drive a bit longer than the plan had been and end up at the Auto repair store. You guessed it. As soon as I turned the car off and tried to start it again...nada, nix, nothing. Ninety-five dollars later, and armed with a new battery, I made my way to AT and T to get a new battery for my Blackberry. It had also lost its will to serve.
My favorite two ladies weren't there, so I relented for the new guy. Didn't have a lot of time. Oh, did I tell you that I had a hot date for lunch and cavity fillings with my favorite 89 year old in town..."Gammy". She dislikes dental appointments with a renewed passion. I knew she'd be oh so glad to reschedule if I "needed to". So, when Junior told me my Blackberry was "so old" they didn't carry or make my battery anymore, I knew it was a message from God.
For twenty dollars more than a new BB, I now am learning to use an IPhone.
By now, I was within 3 minutes of late to pick up my mother in law. So off I sped to Monarch. We had a great lunch...how she does love a cup of soup and a grilled cheese at a neighborhood deli! And the infamous dental appointment went off without a hitch. Dr. Rearden knows she is deaf, doesn't wear her hearing aids, has become adverse to dental work and sitting still that long in the chair terrorizes her back. He is a saint among us as he bellowed how well she was doing over and over again. I wrote the check for the repairs as she was in need of a better chair for a moment. Writing checks that expensive also attacks her frugal mind. We had a great talk on the way home as she is most appreciative of the smallest of our gifts of time and energy.
And then it hit. "It" was gratitude. She mentioned being grateful for all the times her dear husband did extra so she'd be "OK, if he left first". From the grave, my father-in-law was continuing to be the consummate teacher, husband and family man. The Chemist and the Librarian who raised four kids in Oak Ridge, Tenn., took in her Mom and step dad when living in Maine was too expensive and loved everyone God gave them to love as best anyone is able still passes on a legacy of love, commitment and joy in small and large things.
At that moment, 'it" made me laugh out loud. Not wanting my dear mother in law to think I'd gone mad, I quickly shared my epiphany......"Thank God I don't have a pacemaker!!!!" With all the batteries that had died in the last day, "thank God I don't have to wear a pacemaker". As I write this on Wednesday afternoon, I am still smiling as I write this. Naturally, more gratitude crept in, so the list now includes:
"things" broke not people;
we had the money to make to repairs;
the car didn't die with Mom or one of the grand babies in the car;
my sons are all jealous now that (their)Mom has an iPhone;
I was able to go to the (paid, mileage reimbursement, lunch and free Continuing Educ. Units for my social work license) meeting in Montgomery Tuesday and the car started like it had a brand new battery:
Richard is still one of the loveliest gifts God has ever given me;
and
I don't wear a pacemaker.
Blessings,
k+
j
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